We tend to think that the person we are today is the person we always will be. This bias has been explained by Dr Danilel Gilbert in his talk "The Psychology of your future self".
Most people, when asked if they were the same person 10 years ago, will say no but do not see much potential for change in future. Despite the awareness that our past is different from our present, we tend t think that what we are now is the finished version of us and that we will remain the same what we are today. Human beings are a work in progress that is mistakenly thought as finished.
Our personalities change over time whether it is intentional or not. Change is inevitable, but not out of your control. Review the following strategies to help you become the desired future self.
Distinguish your former, current, future self
We tend to emphasise our present self. We cling to our identities and speak in definitive terms about who we are now. When you put a label on yourself, you stop looking for alternatives. If something is seen as an accepted truth, alternative ways of thinking are not even thought of. However, we know that we are never the same person we were. You don't do the things the same way you did in the past, your likes and dislikes have changed.
So instead of labelling yourself, recognise how much you have grown today and changed from your former self. Measure the gain, not the gap ( Dan Sullivan). Train yourself to see even short term growth on a weekly, monthly, quarterly basis. Once you identify the differences and see how you have changed it becomes possible to look at your future as a different person.
Imagine your future self.
Imagination is more important than knowledge. While knowledge embraces what we know and understand, imagination embraces the entire world and all there ever will be to know and understand - Albert Einstein.
It is much easier to be in present than think of the future. Shaping your future requires conscious practice. You cannot effectively grow without a direction, and you need a clear goal to direct your efforts.
Motivation and hope stem from a clear, desired outcome, with the belief that you can succeed, and a path to get there. Humans are drawn forward by their views of the future known as "prospection".
In short your behaviour today is shaped by your view of your future. If you see your future as exciting, clear and something you believe you can create, your behaviour will reflect that. One simple way of imagining your future is by writing it down - journalling. Ask yourself - what are the three things you could do today to progress toward your future desired self? Any action you take today should be outside your comfort zones and if you push through that initial discomfort, you will become flexible and over time grow into a person you want to be.
Change your identity narrative
Identity is more powerful than personality and drives behaviours, over time become personalities. the sum of your consistent attitude and behaviour is a product of your identity. your identity is the story you tell about yourself. If it is rooted in past and present, they gradually become your personality. but if you focus on imagining your future self, it becomes possible to change your identity.
This should be stated explicitly, by telling others around you. Honestly acknowledge that your future self would be different from what you are today. you may not be there yet, but that is where you are going.
This requires courage. Saying publicly what you want to be is risky, as there is no guarantee of success. But it is the only way to become intentional about what you become. It is very powerful since it will force you to behave consistently with your story. It becomes possible to actively transform yourself into the desired future self. So let your future desired self dictate your present behaviour instead of the past. This reinforces the identity you want to be and eventually becomes your identity. It is your behaviour that becomes your personality.
To sum up
- Start telling people,
- act as your future self,
- embrace uncertainty and change,
- embrace learning and failure,
- engage in deliberate practice,
- take action and invest in building your future identity.
Take Ownership of Your Future Self
by Benjamin Hardy HBR Blog 2020/08
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